Thursday, September 18, 2008

Have you called Edgar?

Today's Edgar Cayce thought for the day really hit home:

Do not worry as to whether you are fat or thin. Worry rather as to whether you use your body, mentally and physically, as an expression of thy ideal. - Edgar Cayce Reading 308-8

Riiiiight. Edgar was a man, though. I doubt men have the same hangups about weight as women do. There's an old For Better or For Worse strip that ran during the brief "rerun" period, where John tells Elly it's perfectly acceptable for men to have a little extra...right after he's mentioned how Elly is getting a "little rotund." Of course, in a woman's mind there is rarely such a thing - you're either thin or the size of Rhode Island. Elly then gripes how unfair this world is if "men have love handles and women are just fat."

I started Weight Watchers early this spring and lost ten pounds. I went off and gained it all back. I haven't stepped on a scale in months, but I need only to look in the mirror to see how little progress is beind made there. It's not like I sit at my desk all day and fork down junk, either. There is literally no time to match my many good intentions. I work, I come home and do Phaze stuff in between parenting, and I sleep. That's my life. In the interim I eat and drink 100 oz. of water daily, and that is doing nothing to help.

I've tried to be more accepting of how I look. I wrote Daringly Delicious (hey, it's on sale for $2 from Phaze Books), a BBW romance, as a means of turning my situation into a positive. Yes still in the corner of my conscience is my own John Patterson, needling me about my weight. I really wish Elly had smacked him upside the head in that strip.

And Edgar tells me not to worry about how I look, but how I use myself as an expression of my ideal. What is my ideal, and why is it so damn tired?

1 comment:

krispykreme said...

I agree, you, I, we, we all, should be more accepting of how we look and who we are. I have to get up and speak in front of groups of people, and imagining them in their underwear doesn't always work. I've grown to accept that I'm larger. I go the self-deprecating route and disarm them with a fat joke with me as the target. That seems to be the path you've taken here, with your honesty about your own body image. As a woman, you've got to deal with the problem that most women put on themselves. Women are worst on themselves and each others. As a man, I can honestly say an extra few pounds on a woman never mattered. Ever.